A baker has turned to the internet to ask whether they were in the right or wrong after turning down a customer for what they felt was a ‘cruel’ cake request.

In the ‘Am I The A-hole’ forum on Reddit, the bakery manager explained that a man had requested a cake for his wife’s upcoming 50th Birthday—asking that it be shaped like a coffin because she’s getting “old”. He also said he would be giving her dead roses alongside the morbid cake.

“That seemed awful, like extremely abusive to me, and I guess I made a face,” the poster wrote.

“I said I didn’t feel comfortable doing that. It seems extremely cruel and I would be gutted if a partner did it to me. He asked if I was seriously judging his relationship over a prank and said I’m probably single anyway.

“They left and recently we received a scathing review from the daughter about how rude and unprofessional I was. She included pictures of the coffin cake he ended up getting and the wife was sitting on his lap in the pictures, clearly having a fancy party or something because of how they were dressed. She looks fine/happy though I know I’d be very upset.

“My family is torn. My cousin and mom think I did the right thing, but my grandfather, aunt, and uncle all think I was way too judgey and had no right to turn down business or make him feel bad.”

People responding to the question were torn, although ultimately the majority decided she was indeed in the wrong for passing judgement on someone else’s relationship and refusing them service.

“Judging a customers relationship over their order is very unprofessional and uncalled for. You can simply say “no” citing you do not have the capability nor capacity to do this cake. You are fine to decline an order, but if you do it like this, is will understandably affect your business—something like this is not uncommon,” one responder wrote.

Another offered some blunt advice: “From now on mind your own business and try to focus more on making money and getting good reviews, rather than butting in in other people’s relationships.”